So if you have read any of my past, lengthy, story like entries about my son, his illness and some of things that have happened to me over this past year or so…I have yet another incident to add to story. To recap for those who don’t know, one of the most dramatic “signs” I have received since my son’s illness was early on, when we first heard of my son having cancer last May, here is a snip-it from my original entry “Suffering at the Window Seat” which if you’d like the full story check that entry out AND also take a look the entry called “Signs.” But here is a segment which explains one of my most glaring ‘signs.’
“One night LATE, as I stared at the beige, stark, walls and said the rosary, I had this OVERWHELMING and emotional feeling that I MUST have a statue of Mother Mary in that room with us! She MUST be a visual presence in the room for both my son & myself as a constant reminder that there was someone present who literally knew our pain. I felt as if she was speaking to me, telling me “I understand what you are going through. I watched as my own son was unspeakably tortured and brutally killed and I could do nothing to ease His pain. I am here with you & I will cradle your son.” There were times that I so strongly felt her presence & just KNEW she was there beside my son as he slept.”…” I e-mailed a friend from that window seat and asked if there was any way she could get a small statue of Mary to the hospital and I would reimburse her. I didn’t care if she was plastic & an inch high. Well, this friend was kind enough to meet my husband the VERY NEXT MORNING at my children’s school and gifted us her OWN, beautiful statue of Our Mother which my husband brought directly to us at the hospital. I felt this urge to say the rosary as often as possible and with that urge came this necessity to ask others to do so as well.” …”One LOUD signal God gave me in answer to my most worrisome question happened one of the nights at that window seat when my cell phone rang. I did not recognized the number & I honestly I don’t even know why I picked up but I did. It wound up being a girlfriend from GRAMMAR SCHOOL that I hadn’t talked to in probably 10 years. She had heard about my son from a mutual friend. Her father was a well known Orthopedic surgeon in a very affluent area of the state and she, herself went on to become a doctor of pharmaceutical research at Pfizer. As one can imagine, when faced with the scenario my family was, one of the biggest fears we could have is “Do we have the right doctors for our son? Is this the right hospital etc?” We were at the mercy of the local hospital that we were admitted to. My old friend shared with me that when she heard the news, she felt the least she could do was find out the very best doctors & facility for the kind of cancer our son had in the area. She felt confident in being able to assist us because she personally knew one of the best pediatric oncologists in the country!! What an incredible God send. So she called this doctor & told him our story. The doctor began asking “Now wait, what kind of cancer is it? Who is this kid to you? How do you know this family? This isn’t O. Smith is it?”….the doctor on the other end of the phone was none other than the doctor who admitted my son the very 1st day at our local hospital & was currently treating him. OUR DOCTOR was one of the best pediatric oncologists in the country. AND as rare as my son’s cancer is (less than 100 kids are reported to get it per year)…this doctor and his team see it & treat it at least twice annually...there was pure hysterical crying & outbursts by me from this revelation. At that very moment I KNEW God had reached out to me and asked me to leave it ALL at his feet. He was YELLING to me that THIS burden of worry, this PART of this horrible experience, was taken care of for me and taken off my plate. I will go to my grave believing that divine intervention took place that night to specifically tell me…”Trust in me” and that is when I began saying the “Divine Mercy Chaplet”
OK, so that was one of MANY signs I believe I have received since this whole ordeal has started with my son but it was probably the most dramatic until this week. Although my son has been deemed “cancer free” since October, he has still had to undergo many terrible and horrible cancer treatments that have beat up his body pretty badly which has sent him back & forth to the hospital for many unscheduled stays due to him getting infections when his blood counts drop too low. Well, this week was no different. His blood counts dropped dramatically low & my husband had to whisk him off to the hospital yet again for admission while they fought off yet another terrible infection over the course of the rest of week. I could not be with my boy because someone had to be at home with my OTHER child and get her off to school the following day and I have now taken a job that I of course needed to get to. So I have had an increasingly difficult time emotionally dealing with being away from my sick boy when he has to be admitted for potentially a week at a time. Well, I shared my feelings with some friends & everyone was feeling badly or me & offering so many encouraging words& I knew so many were praying for us all.
Well, the following morning I woke up, renewed and ready to be strong while we rode out this experience for the rest of the week. I will share with you that a new year’s resolution I made to myself was that I was going to try & say the rosary (and if I had the time the Divine Mercy Chaplet) every day. So, I resolved to do it on my car ride into my office. Then as a Lenten promise, I renewed my promise and decided to make sure I added the Divine Mercy Chaplet to my practice no matter what. So, Thursday morning I said these prayers with special intentions for my son & family that morning and for some reason, I had gotten to my office super early…I had 30 minutes to kill so I whipped out my Word document of prayers (I mentioned in the past this is how I keep all my favorite prayers for easy access…I transcribed them all to a Word doc that I carry with me) & decided to say these as well. As I said these, I was thinking about how I had been wanting to purchase a Brown Scapular for sometime but because I needed to do some homework on just exactly what wearing a Scapular entailed, I had put it off. So, I strengthened my resolve & said to myself “Today Liz, after work you’re going home & doing your homework on Brown Scapulars & purchasing one online.” With that, I jumped out of my car & made my way into the building to my desk. I happen to be fortunate enough to work with a friend of mine, she had heard about my son heading to the hospital the night before & stopped by my desk to offer some encouraging words. I shared with her my moment of weakness the night before & how lately it was getting more emotionally difficult for me to watch my son & husband run out the door time & time again. She kind of jumped up and said “I have something for you…” and left my cube & returned a moment later and handed me a Brown Scapular. I have never shared with ANYONE my thoughts on wanting a Brown Scapular and for me to have been thinking of this no more than fifteen minutes prior to someone handing me one! I was so flabbergasted…I literally JUMPED up and I began crying and practically yelling. My poor friend had no idea what was taking place before her eyes. I tried to calm down & share with her just exactly the gravity of what took place. She said, oddly enough, that this was not something she had been thinking about doing. This Scapular was her Mother’s prior to her passing & something she kept with her. She said “while you were talking, it was as if someone told me in my ear ‘you have something for her’ and as the thought entered my brain it came out my mouth…I hadn’t thought about the Scapular for so long & the thought literally popped into my brain!” as the day went on she became increasingly more flabbergasted herself over what transpired. Think about the oddity…this wasn’t a breath mint she handed me! This wasn’t even a cross (something far more common) this was a somewhat rare, specifically Catholic, religious item that she just happened to have with her. This was an idea she claims was not even her own until that very moment & we were not discussing ANYTHING even remotely religious at the time. It truly is amazing.
Folks, every single time I enhance my prayer life something occurs to remind me, to tell me that God is pleased and what I am doing is right. In this case, the ‘sign’ had multiple outcomes. 1) It told me God was pleased 2) I needed strength that day & God CLEARLY gave it to me and 3) there was another person involved (as were many other experiences I had) that I believe was very specifically meant so the OTHER person would be moved to evangelize because of event that took place.
This is why Jesus performed miracles while He walked he earth….not because He was nice…but because we humans need to see to believe. I write this blog to share & pass long these types of things so maybe, just maybe one or two people will be moved enough be completely converted. Miraculous things continue to happen in my life ONLY so I can assist people in their own faith. I strongly believe that. Yes, these events have helped me through this extraordinarily difficult time but these events are not for me to keep to myself…I am not special…these ‘signs’ are for everyone if you only ask for them. If you completely give yourself over and TRULY believe in ALL of the Catholic Church’s teachings and communicate with God through prayer (especially through the rosary & veneration of Mary) God will be there to assist each and every one of us.
We do not have to like or agree with every human who works for or within the Church…but we DO have to believe, trust and follow EVERY teaching of the Church. She is infallible in all her teachings. Perfect in every way and that is why it is so important we all spread this message.
God bless you this Sunday morning.
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